Monday, April 21, 2008

Marriage, Life and Song

I recently met a 21 year old Kuwaiti bride. She wasn't studying, hadn't worked a day in her life and was on top of the world about marrying her nephew who she'd only spoken to twice in person. From what she told me, 'he saw her once and he loved her'. This worried me. I worried for her. I also worry about my friends who worry that, at 25, they aren't engaged to be married. They make me want to grab them by the shoulders and shake them so hard, their brains rattle and their teeth fall out.

MY GOODNESS! It's unfathomable how much there is in life to see, feel, do and experience. I know you can't do it all. But does that mean you shouldn't try and do everything you possibly can? Your youth and the strength that comes with it, those're the two things you'll miss the most when they're gone. There's so much we're capable of. All we have to do is want it bad enough.

Many people will argue that procreation is the natural order of things. Well, guess what. There IS no natural order of things anymore. Not when it comes to human beings at least. WE decide what to do with our lives, our bodies and our genes. That is what sets us apart from less intelligent beings, like monkeys and goats. We can think, reason and make logical choices (most of us, at least). We have, essentially, defied nature with those abilities. In most ways, we're no longer slaves to our baser instincts. We decide whether or not we want to mate, bear children, wander the earth, live or just exist.

Why are we here? We are here to do whatever the fuck we want. That's just how it is.

Richard Dawkins has a more eloquent explanation in his brilliant, exciting and slightly scary Discovery Science documentary 'The Big Question: Why are we here?' (Part 1, Part 2 & Part 3). It's worth the watch.

Okay, I'm done. For now.

Want to hear something pretty?

This is Roy Orbison's original 'Crying'.

And this, *sigh* , is Rebekah Del Rio's hauntingly powerful, Spanish acappella version from the movie 'Mulholland Drive'.


Anonymous said...

I never guessed that she was singing 'crying ' but maybe i was too caught up in the weirdness of the movie . Remember when Noami masturbates .. hmmm .

Anonymous said...

Her nephew? How soon can we hear an Arabic rendition of "I'm my own grandpa"?

I'm 25, as well, and I'm... oh, nevermind. :D

david santos said...

Hello, Ri.
Excellent! I love it! Very, very good.
Thank you.

Ri said...


I haven't seen the movie yet, but hell, I'm *going* to watch it now :D


I'm not sure she isn't already her own mother.

You're 25 and what? Huh? HUH? WHAT?


Hi. Thank you kindly. You're very welcome. But what exactly did you love?

manutdfanatic said...


The bride reminds me SO much of someone I once knew, except she was merely 19, had seen, yes only seen the guy once in her life and knew little about him except his education, age et cetera. The poor thing only just finished giving birth to his first child, and he's already contemplating marrying again.

Chop chop chop. That's what I'd love to do.

On another note, if we really ARE here to do what we want, and considering the girl's elation at marrying her nephew, it is precisely what she feels she wants; I say, let go.

Jewaira said...

She cannot marry her nephew if she is Muslim :P

I think innocence is bliss and so is knowing what you want even if that means not wanting to do anything

N. said...

Jewaira has a point, Ri do you mean second cousin? Or just cousin maybe?

Either way, some people are simple like that. That is what they want, and it is good for them.

With life, I don't think you're missing a lot. If you think you are, and that you will be missing a lot, you're up for a rough ride..

Ri said...


I did let go. I didn't do anything. I kept all my frustration to myself. It just bothers me that people that are capable of so much can want so little for themselves.


She told me herself that he was her nephew. They were of approximately the same age but she took particular delight in explaining to me that they were actually related. And yes, she was utterly blissful. But like I was telling manutdfanatic, I just want people to want more out of life for themselves. But you are right. Intelligent people are seldom happy or content. 'Tis the curse of the blessed.


No, I mean nephew. The groom's father was her brother. Cousin brother or sibling, she didn't say. I don't know how it worked out.

As for missing a lot, everyone is. That is because you can't do it all. I understand that.

But within each person's reach are a certain number of things. Things that allow a person to explore and discover his or her full potential. You don't have to achieve them all, but shouldn't you at least try and reach for them?

There's nothing wrong with being simple. Sometimes I wish I was less complicated. I would've been a hell of a lot less miserable. But that's the way the cookie crumbles, no?

Ooh, and rough rides are what I live for. BRING IT ON *growl*

N. said...

I'm guessing he's her cousin by (for what the word was, when the mother breastfeed a kid a number of times, and thus he is somewhat considered her child as well... don't ask, I can't explain it any better) we'll call it by association.

I'm reaching, hopefully will get to something.. somehow.. rough rides aren't for me no more, they used to be. I do tend to miss that excitement though once in a while. There's something about that rush.. that always does things, nice things.